"It's easy to build a brick airplane. It's difficult to find engines big enough to get it off the ground"

--GM

 

Trying to determine what is going on in the world by surfing the internet is like trying to tell the time by watching the second hand of a clock.

--GM

 

To be a patriotic American in this day and age, requires a healthy sense of the ironic.

--GM

 

Small children have a gift for being 4 inches beyond your reach at any given time.

--GM

 

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

-- Edmund Burke

 

When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.

-- P. J. O'Rourke

 

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.

-- Clarence Darrow

 

This is the basis for our Public Education System: citizens who are destined to serve burgers for a living don't need higher mathematics.

--GM

 

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language.

-- Buck Henry

 

Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel.

-- Samuel Johnson

 

Democracy is only as good as the people who try to make it work

-- David Susuki

 

"One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors."

-- Plato

 

"Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it."

-- George Bernard Shaw

 

Patriotism does not oblige us to acquiesce in the destruction of liberty. Patriotism obliges us to question it, at least.

-- Wendy Kaminer

 

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

-- Mark Twain

 

A professional politician is a professionally dishonorable man. In order to get anywhere near high office he has to make so many compromises and submit to so many humiliations that he becomes indistinguishable from a streetwalker.

-- Disraeli

 

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction.

-- Blaise Pascal

 

America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between.

-- Oscar Wilde

 

The laughter of children is the finest sound in the universe.

--GM

 

"We must remember that a right lost to one is lost to all."

-- William Reece Smith, Jr.

 

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect.

--Mark Twain

 

When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail.

-- Abraham Maslow

 

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.

-- Will Rogers

 

Never remind a someone that you were right, being correct is one thing that is cannot be forgiven.

--GM

 

The miracle and tragedy of human kind is that they will invariably reach for more than they are willing to grasp.

--GM

 

It seems a shame, to me, that we do not get smarter as rapidly as we get older.

--GM

 

"One man's truth, is another man's belly laugh.

--GM

 

The things we see, feel, and believe are a collection of perceptual sets. We filter reality through very limited sensory apparatus, and make assumptions based on incomplete information. This is called Science.

--GM

 

Anthropology tends to ascribe noble motivations to the species. Unlike the many Anthro-a-pologists I know, I do not subscribe to the Noble Savage theory of civilization. Humans are filthy, malodorous beasts, often harboring the basest of intentions. Shave off the hair, pluck the carcass free of vermin, stand it upright; and you have a clean beast. Many of the people I see every day, might better be chained to an immovable object.

--GM

 

If two wrongs don't make a right, how is it that three lefts do?

--GM

 

Bagpipes: the sound of a great many cats, in a good deal of distress.

--GM

 

I don't beleive in Fairy Tales, I write them. There is a world of difference.

--GM

 

Infinity is any number higher than one can count

--GM

 

"Vengence is the sincerest form of flattery."

--GM

 

"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."

-- Voltaire

 

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

-- George Jean Nathan

 

In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican.

-- H. L. Mencken

 

No man is good enough to govern another man without that other's consent.

-- Abraham Lincoln

 

Our schools have been scientifically designed to prevent over-education from happening. [...] The average American (should be) content with their humble role in life, because they're not tempted to think about any other role.

-- William Torrey Harris, U.S. Commissioner of Education, 1889

 

"A long and wicked life followed by five minutes of perfect grace gets you into Heaven. An equally long life of decent living and good works followed by one outburst of taking the name of the Lord in vain—then have a heart attack at that moment and be damned for eternity. Is that the system?"

-Robert A. Heinlein

 

America's one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.

-- Bobcat Goldthwait

 

The remarkable thing about television is that it permits several million people to laugh at the same joke and still feel lonely.

-- T. S. Eliot

 

"The important thing is not to stop questioning."

-- Albert Einstein

 

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen

-- Albert Einstein

 

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

-- Benjamin Disraeli

 

History repeats itself; that's one of the things that's wrong with history.

-- Clarence Darrow

 

How is it possible to have a civil war?

-- George Carlin

 

What good is the moon if you can't buy or sell it?

-- Ivan Boesky, inside stock trader

 

"There are no passengers on spaceship earth. We are all crew."

-- Marshall McLuhan

 

"The police are not here to create disorder, they're here to preserve disorder."

-- Former Chicago Mayor Daley during the infamous 1968 convention

 

"It's a very sad occasion and one that could set a terrible legal precedent. Al Gore isn't the only loser. It's democracy and the American people as well."

-- Barbra Streisand, on the Supreme Court ruling that put GEORGE W. BUSH in the White House

 

If you give a hungry man a loaf of bread it's Democracy. If you leave "Wonder Bread" on the wrapper, it's Capitalism.

-- GM

 

The world will be a better place when the last politician is strangled to death with the guts of the last evangalist.

-- Unknown

 

"To announce that there must be no criticism of the president, or that we are to stand by the president, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public."

-- U.S. President (and Nobel Peace Prize winner) Theodore Roosevelt.

 

"During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act."

-- George Orwell

 

I wrestled with reality for thirty-odd years and I'm happy to say I finally won out ...

-- Ellwood P. Dowd

 

"The public have an insatiable curiosity to know everything. Except what is worth knowing. Journalism, conscious of this, and having tradesman-like habits, supplies their demands."

-- Oscar Wilde

 

"A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything."

-- Robert A. Heinlein

 

Author: A fool, who, not content with having bored those who have lived with him, insists on tormenting the generations to come.

-- Montesquieu